Sunday, January 25, 2009

Nostalgia

The artwork in this post is all on 8.5 x 11" paper in some combination of ink, watercolor, and oil pastel. Shipping is included in the listed prices.



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When I was five years old, I knew I wanted to be two things when I grew up: an artist and a writer. Though these desires have never flagged, at times my confidence has. Therefore, my life has occasionally strayed — quite unhappily — far from the mark.

About ten years ago, I was working construction by day and dabbling in (but mostly feeling discouraged about) my writing and art at night and on the weekends. Perhaps it was the day that I learned to run the jackhammer that things began to change.

Running a jackhammer was a secret dream since childhood. It seemed entirely outside of my grasp. After all, I only saw jackhammers on construction sites in the hands of muscle-bound men in hardhats. Construction sites, not to mention hardhats, seemed completely inaccessible. Great big biceps seemed, well, not exactly desirable. But the day I ran the jackhammer I learned that not everything that looks hard is hard.

Perhaps it was a true epiphany. Perhaps my brain had just been jostled out of complacency by a loud, violently vibrating machine, but very soon thereafter it hit me: I was already both an artist and a writer. And not only that, but: I can run a jackhammer! It didn't matter if I believed in myself. It didn't matter if I was "successful" in any sense of the word. I am free to dedicate as much energy and resource as I can muster to my cause: the full realization of me.

These drawings/paintings of grapes come from that time. In fact, they were the first thing I did after realizing that I wanted to keep my art and writing as the central creative pursuits of my life. I gave a bowl of grapes to myself as an assignment, a drawing challenge, a creative inspiration, and finally, after several nights' work, a snack.

I hope you, dear readers, invest in yourselves similarly.





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1 comment:

Jim DuBois said...

Nice pictures of grapes, and story about your epiphany.